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Defibrillator not Included


Illustration by Adam McCauley

Any baseball fan whose pregame tailgate ritual includes guzzling beers while pounding down hot dogs in the parking lot knows that baseball and gluttony go together. Apparently, the Oakland Athletics agree.

This season, a new ticket option will be available to A’s fans and overeaters alike: All-You-Can-Eat seating. The tarps that have covered upper deck seats at McAfee Coliseum for the last two seasons will be removed from three sections behind home plate. A $35 ticket will gain you access to one of these seats and a dedicated concession area where you can get as many ballpark standards—hot dogs, nachos, peanuts, popcorn, soda, and ice cream—as you can eat before you burst.

Cardiologist appointments, gym memberships, stomach-stapling surgeries, and, most distressingly, beer are not included in the ticket price.

Tickets are available at www.oaklandathletics.com.

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